Last night, we were out at our favorite restaurant, celebrating my daughter Emma’s birthday. After a fine meal, we came home and sat up late, discussing, as we often do, the fact that she seems more like 26 than 14 — not precocious in a pseudo-mature way, but genuinely older than her age. People with […]
Mothballing Your Parents Read More »
For the last 12 years, I’ve belonged to a writer’s group that meets every Thursday afternoon for two hours. We read our works-in-progress, giving support and constructive criticism to each other; we spend years reading and listening to different drafts of our books, so it’s an important event, something to celebrate, when a book by
‘Butterfly’s Child’ by Angela-Davis Gardner: A Review Read More »
When people find out I’m a therapist, they usually assume I chose my profession because I want to help others. While I derive a deep sense of satisfaction from doing just that, I mostly chose to become a therapist because it was the only line of work I could envision that would support me and
Why I’m a Therapist Read More »
Before I decided to stop writing my ‘Movies and Mental Health’ blog, I had intended to do a video about the narcissistic mother as portrayed in two different films, Black Swan and The Fighter; in this post, I’ll be referring to those films but I won’t include video clips. If you haven’t seen them, I
The Narcissistic Mother Read More »
When couples who have idealized one another and their marriage divorce, they often engage in a battle about who is the “winner” and who the “loser” who must carry all the shame.
The Shame-Based Divorce Read More »
A degree of parental hostility and resentment toward infants is normal though not usually acknowledged. This article looks at ways we may unconsciously give voice to those feelings, or split them off and direct them elsewhere.
Of Puppies and Parenting Read More »
The healing of shame does not mean “triumphing” over it, but rather learning to bear that shame and not respond defensively to it, thereby earning feelings of pride and self-respect.
Pride and the Healing of Shame Read More »
Three unusual pieces of relationships advice you won’t find on other Internet sites devoted to dating and relationship problems.
Relationship Advice You Won’t Find Elsewhere on the Internet Read More »
Behind the apparent helplessness of people who suffer from extreme emotional dependency often lies a a secret and unacknowledged fantasy of controlling everybody around them and coercing them to adopt the role of caretakers.
Emotional Dependency and Stealth Control Read More »
Some people use their friends as a kind of “toilet” into which they can dump all their bad feelings. These individuals rely on a primitive kind of projection to evacuate experience they are unable to tolerate.
The Toilet Function of Friendship (and Other Relationships) Read More »