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After Psychotherapy

Insights from 30+ years in the profession

Tag: Relationship Issues

Relationship Advice You Won’t Find Elsewhere on the Internet

Three unusual pieces of relationships advice you won’t find on other Internet sites devoted to dating and relationship problems.

Published January 11, 2011
Categorized as Destinations, Relationship Issues, Sexuality Tagged feelings and emotions, intimacy, Relationship Issues

Emotional Dependency and Stealth Control

Behind the apparent helplessness of people who suffer from extreme emotional dependency often lies a a secret and unacknowledged fantasy of controlling everybody around them and coercing them to adopt the role of caretakers.

Published January 2, 2011
Categorized as Detours, Points of Departure, Relationship Issues, The Psychotherapy Relationship Tagged Neediness, Psychotherapy, Relationship Issues

Further Thoughts on the Lost Art of Conversation

Conversations with strangers in the context of a common interest, discussing a shared passion, can feel more intimate than another dinner out, listening to an old friend complain about her latest boyfriend.

Published December 24, 2010
Categorized as Destinations, Social Behavior Tagged Relationship Issues

The Toilet Function of Friendship (and Other Relationships)

Some people use their friends as a kind of “toilet” into which they can dump all their bad feelings. These individuals rely on a primitive kind of projection to evacuate experience they are unable to tolerate.

Published December 21, 2010
Categorized as Relationship Issues, Rules of the Road, Social Behavior, Unbearable Emotion Tagged Emotions and feelings, Psychotherapy, Relationship Issues

‘Avatar’, Toxic Shame and Avoidance of Authentic Relationships

The movie ‘Avatar’ embodies a fantasy shared by many people that it’s possible to escape one’s earthly damaged self and become a superior being without defects.

Published December 3, 2010
Categorized as Relationship Issues, Shame/Narcissism, Society and Culture Tagged Basic shame, Psychotherapy, Relationship Issues, Therapist

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