Defenses Against Shame
Narcissism, blaming and contempt — the three core defenses against shame — are illustrated with clinical material from the author’s psychotherapy practice.
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Detours
Psychological evasions that lead us away from the truth
Merger Fantasies in Psychotherapy
Bipolar and borderline clients who feel hopeless about their capacity for meaningful change often idealize their therapists and unconsciously try to merge with them; this fantasy of merger represents an escape from the damaged self into an alternative ideal self embodied by the therapist, a sort of personal growth by annexation.
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Emotional Dependency and Stealth Control
Behind the apparent helplessness of people who suffer from extreme emotional dependency often lies a a secret and unacknowledged fantasy of controlling everybody around them and coercing them to adopt the role of caretakers.
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Autism Symptoms in Other Disorders
Autism symptoms may appear in other disorders though the person doesn’t reach the threshold for a full diagnosis of autism. Common autism symptoms displayed in such cases are flattening of emotion through the repetitive, circular use of words and music, and the deadening of relationships in which separation cannot be tolerated.
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Unbearable Emotions and Feelings
A case study of bulimia as a means to discuss unexpected emotions and feelings and how we try to get rid of them.
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A Psychodynamic Perspective on Idealization
A fantasy that life should be perfect and goals achieved without effort often lies behind procrastination, the inability to set goals, and different forms of artistic inhibition such as writer’s block.
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Self-Hatred and Self-Criticism
Self-criticism may disguise anger about unmet expectations for ourselves and our lives.
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Your Plan for a Person
An idealized self-image can be an effort to deny internal damage that is felt to be irreparable.
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