Category Archives: Self-Esteem and Self-Sabotage

Self-Loathing

This gallery contains 1 photo.

About 30 years ago during analytic training, my good friend Tom Grant was describing a difficult case in seminar — a man in his mid-30s whom Tom had already been treating for quite some time. Tom’s client came from a … Continue reading

More Galleries | 39 Comments

Shyness and Self-Hatred

Early in my career, when clients would talk about intense forms of self-criticism or self-loathing, I used to make interpretations that focused on the savage and perfectionistic superego. Over time, I’d help them develop the mental ability to withstand this … Continue reading

More Galleries | 70 Comments

The Client Who Wants to Remain Invisible

Several readers responding to my recent post about a client who felt invisible have asked me to discuss the opposite experience — the person who fears being seen and desperately wants to remain invisible. It’s a very different issue, with … Continue reading

More Galleries | 42 Comments

The Invisible Child

I’ve always struggled with the term attachment, used in my profession to denote the relationship that is supposed to develop between mother and infant during the earliest months of life. I may be too concrete, but it makes me think … Continue reading

More Galleries | 71 Comments

What I Mean When I Use the Word Shame

I’m just about ready to deliver a draft of my book on defenses to the other members of my writer’s group; as part of the final revisions, I’ve been attempting to clarify my ideas about shame as they’re so central … Continue reading

More Galleries | 87 Comments